Two minutes for you to read and reflect

When an old farmer’s stallion wins a prize at a country show, his neighbor calls round to congratulate him, but the farmer says, “Who knows what is good and what is bad?” The next day some thieves come and steal his valuable animal. His neighbor comes to commiserate with him, but the old man replies, “Who knows what is good and what is bad?” A few days later the spirited stallion escapes from the thieves and joins a herd of wild mares, leading them back to the farm. The neighbor calls to share the farmer’s joy, but the farmer says, “Who knows what is good and what is bad?” The following day, while trying to break in one of the wild mares, the farmer’s son is thrown and fractures his leg. The neighbor calls to share the farmer’s sorrow, but the old man’s attitude remains the same as before. The following week the army passes by, forcibly conscripting solders for a war, but they do not take the farmer’s son because he cannot walk. The neighbor thinks to himself, “Who knows what is good and what is bad?” - Excerpt from The Tao Book and Card Pack by Timothy Freke

For many years my husband Jeff and I have felt challenged to live on the monetary income we receive from his Olympic athletic endeavors. Athletes in Canada do not live richly from large corporate sponsors unless they are one of a handful in well supported and high profile sports. We have spent years trying to create buy-in for companies to support Jeff in his cause and in doing so, help our family pay for just the day to day expenses. Jeff is one of very few senior athletes in Canada that is also married with children, putting us in a category that some funds and sponsors do not like. We don’t fit the young, single and easy-to-put-a-number-on athlete of the majority and have had funding declined because of that. We used to feel sorry for ourselves and hard done by because of our financial situation. Many people shared in the sympathy and we felt quite right about how hard it was.

In today’s very uncertain economy, we have never felt so lucky to be an athlete in Canada. In offices where the lay offs are happening daily and pink slips are becoming in fashion, we are in a career where that does not happen. Jeff will not be ‘laid off’ the team, get blind-sided by a pink slip or have to clear his desk and leave the building. Our income may not be rising with inflation, nor did it a few years ago in the boom, but it is still coming in and that is great! Better yet, we have had years of advance notice as to the pink slip arrival and plenty of time to make a plan to transition. We began the one year countdown on February 19th at 8pm. Fourteen years down and now less than one to go!

So, in the years of complaining about the financial hardships of choosing to be an elite Athlete in Canada, to having a recession proof career in a tough economy, I quote the words of Timothy Freke. “Who knows what is good and what is bad?”

Aly Pain, CPCC, ACC

InnerPiece Team & Relationship Coaching Specialist

Public Speaker and Emcee Extraordinaire

ph. 403-246-2399 | fx. 403-263-8790 | www.alypain.com | aly@alypain.com

This past weekend my son had quite a health scare. We are coming out the other side now with God’s grace and healing, and the support and prayer of many. This has really got me to thinking about the Power of Prayer.

I have been searching the internet for studies on the Power of Prayer. It seems there are many sighted in the Washington Post and New York Times that both prove the power of prayer and have equal numbers of skeptics. These studies vary in detail from people being prayed for, and knowing about it, by someone in the same place, to distance prayer where the prayee has no idea and the prayer is half a world away. It seems in most all the studies there was a positive difference in the group that was prayed for, whether local or distant, compared to the group without prayer.

The skeptics say there are far too many variables left out and therefore the studies are invalid. They also say we are wasting government money on accompaniments to medicine through religious practice rather than looking directly for more medical advances. Christian leaders, in response to these alligations of failed studies, say that trying to limit something as awesome and powerful as God with science is pointless seeing that God is not bound by the laws of science.

I am personally saying that prayer works. I have not only had tangible proof of this in my life, but in the life of my son this weekend. My son had a basic flu virus for seven days. He recovered on day eight and went back to his usual routine. On day twelve, he found a huge hematoma on his hip. Within 24 hours he was covered in bruises and we took him to the Children’s hospital. The doctors found his blood platelet count, normally 150 to 400, to be a very low 1 with elevated white blood cell count. He was diagnosed with ITP and they quickly took a CT scan of his brain (he had severe headaches that night) and a bone marrow test that both came back normal. Then came the IV treatment to get his antibodies under control and help raise is platelet count. Within 30 hours his count was up to 25 and we were released. Another two days later he was up and around and eating well.

http://www.nhlbi.nih.gov/health/dci/Diseases/Itp/ITP_WhatIs.html

During all of that hospital time, we were Blessed by having our church congregation praying for us. We have no idea of the exact number of people but it was over 100 and they were praying specifically for our son’s platelet count to rise. If you had seen the state of my son’s body when we arrived and then to be on the mend and released just 38 hours later, sooner than expected, you may also believe in the Power of Prayer. You might also say that result could have happened without prayer and I would agree. However, if I were given the choice of leaving things up to chance or having the big guy’s hand on this, I choose door number 2.

Today we had my son’s blood platelet levels tested and they came back with a whoping 230!! That is the power of prayer and miracles right there. Yes, for those of you medical folks, this can be a false high due to the medication he received so we will be getting tested again in three weeks after it wears off. I have no doubt that the levels will remain above 150, the minimum number.

Prayer works. I believe that and it works for me. All the studies did show some correlation with prayer and health regardless of what controls were used. So, if you were given the choice in a place of need of prayer or not, what would you choose? Seems interesting to me that in most cases of dire circumstance, even the most firm unbeliever will raise his eyes to the heavens and begin to pray. Is it a learned response, or are we simply looking up and returning to the one who created us in the first place? You decide for yourself but my mind is already made up.

Aly Pain, CPCC, ACC
InnerPiece Team & Relationship Coaching Specialist
Public Speaker and Emcee Extraordinaire
ph. 403-246-2399 fx. 403-263-8790 www.alypain.com aly@alypain.com
“Success is not external shining in; it’s internal radiating out”

As I sit today and write this blog I am in the early stages of a cold. Nothing really serious, but a cold none the less. So, have I lost my mind or why the heck would I be celebrating being sick??

I have written a few times before that my husband, Jeff, is away for most of the winter competing on the Skeleton World Cup circuit. That leaves our two boys and me at home to run the regular and sometimes mundane routine of this life. I think this past 8 years has been the most challenging and rewarding for me, and I can measure it with sickness and health.

I am an extreme extrovert and need other adults around often to feel balanced. When my children are at school in recent years, I experience a high ‘do or die’ need for freedom, so being alone in those times is fine with me. This is how I function best, being with other adults or alone with no children and in my freedom.

There were many years where I was not as clear on these two things. Fortunately, I live in the most amazing community where there were a few other new mothers that were looking for connection. The four (and sometimes more) of us were at each other’s home for play dates a few times through out the week plus some trips to the neighbourhood park. Those times kept me going more than I knew and I felt like I had the patience of Job, a Hercules Heart, and the parenting brain of Barbara Coloroso.

Then, there were all the minutes, hours and days I spent with our boys in our home or doing other activities with no other adult. In those times I have never felt so alone and isolated. Hard to believe that at a Zoo, crawling with people, I would feel alone and isolated. Inside my head everything would go numb after a while, like trying hear clearly with plugged ears. My heart would go into coping mode and start to shut down as well. I felt hopeless and, despite having more energy than the Energizer Bunny, I felt constantly fatigued as if no amount of rest and sleep would do. Sounds like depression, doesn’t it? Well, that is not far from wrong.

When my husband would leave, and sometimes before he would leave, I would get sick. I don’t mean just a little cold, I mean major sinus infections and strep throat. One year I had Strep three times in four months. Our boys were relatively healthy and would get sick a normal amount for little ones. I would be calling friends to come and help me with the boys some days because I just could not get off the couch I felt so awful. These were long and not very fun years of feeling abandoned, resentful and very much in victim.

I am so grateful for the knowledge, love and acceptance of who I am now such that I have set my life up around this. I know that I need people and freedom to stay at the top of my game. I know that we are a strong family regardless of where we are geographically. I know that I can create the life that I want to feel fulfilled and I will be healthier and happier. I know that is what our boys want, not a depressed and victim mom, even if it means I need to get a sitter once a week. I know that the path Jeff and I are on is very specific for us and we are being called up to much more. This refinement by fire has been needed to learn what we have learned about ourselves and our relationship, and it is so much better than it has ever been! I love my life and my marriage (going on thirteen years!). I still feel very sad about Jeff being away so much and I am gifted to have an end date of February 19th, 2010.

Today I am celebrating having a cold for the first time in about six months! This is HUGE measurement of how far I have come in my journey. Many times a measure of success or forward movement is not about monetary means. It can be a subtle mental or physical change you notice. Regardless, it is reason to celebrate so I am sharing this with you and having lunch with a friend.

Beyond money, what would a measure of success be for you? How would you know when things are changing? What would it feel like? Finding the answers to these questions is what I do with my clients every day in supporting them to create and live the life they feel most fulfilled by. Let me know when it is your turn!

Aly Pain, CPCC, ACC
InnerPiece Team & Relationship Coaching Specialist
Public Speaker and Emcee Extraordinaire
ph. 403-246-2399 fx. 403-263-8790 www.alypain.com aly@alypain.com
“Success is not external shining in; it’s internal radiating out”