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Finding OUR Way is a private online community dedicated to equipping parents of tweens/teens to navigate these challenging years and build healthy, lasting relationships.

Parenting has changed because teenaged life has changed (DRASTICALLY)…

Your teenagehood is not THEIR teenagehood.

Yes, there were bullies back in your day, but they didn’t have digital access to you 24/7 (nor was their reach your entire peer group).

Yes, you had homework stress, but a solid B average was good enough to get you into school (good luck with those grades today thanks to grading inflation).

Yes, you were full of confusing hormones and impulses that maybe lead you to poor decisions, but it wasn’t likely those poor choices would get you banned from university or end up in a morgue thanks to tainted drug supply.

Our world is worse for teens and studies show it.

  • It is estimated that 10-20% of Canadian youth are affected by a mental illness or disorder – the single most disabling group of disorders worldwide.

  • The total number of 12-19-year-olds in Canada at risk for developing depression is a staggering 3.2 million.

  • Mental illness is increasingly threatening the lives of our children; with Canada’s youth suicide rate the third highest in the industrialized world.

  • Kids who have a secure relationship with their parents are better at regulating their emotions when faced with stress and difficult situations

That’s WHY I created Finding OUR Way for Parents…

Psst…Hey, parents want to know a little secret?

Your teens need (and want) a happy, healthy relationship WITH YOU

  • Children who have a healthy relationship with their parents are more likely to develop positive relationships with other people around them. They can establish secure bonds and friendships with peers.

  • A secure attachment with parents helps promote a child’s cognitive, emotional and social development. It also helps kids exhibit positive social behaviors.

  • The healthy involvement of parents in their children’s day to day life helps ensure that their kids can perform better socially and academically.

  • Children who have a secure and positive relationship with their parents learn essential skills and values that set them on the path for future success.

When I posted a TikTok video on the top three things teens wished their parents knew, I never imagined the response it would get (or who would respond the most vocally).

A million views and 20,000 new TEEN followers later, the message was loud and clear: teens wanted advice on how to improve their relationship with their parents.

The most common comment was “How can I show this video to my parents without actually showing it to them?” The teens wanted to be SEEN, to be UNDERSTOOD, by the people who mattered the most to them, their parents.

Yes…YOU!

Trust me when I say they need you now more than ever (yes, this applies to the teens who act all independent and stand-offish). The trouble is they don’t know how to ask for what they want (or need) and they’re also trying to assert themselves as individuals who are moments away from adulthood!!!!!

(It’s a confusing time for them too).

The result is a lot of snarky attitude and parents backing off when they need to be stepping forward. Let me teach you how to break through those relationship barriers and get back on track with your teen!

Finding OUR Way for Parents of Tweens/Teens

Finding OUR Way for Parents is a private online community for parents of tweens/teens dedicated to equipping you to navigate these challenging years and build healthy, lasting relationships.

Ongoing Training and Support –  Unlike structured online courses, there is no beginning or end, or even a set curriculum. Our members set the direction of the weekly lessons and Q&A sessions based on questions and comments. If you have a question, ask the group or submit it privately.

On-Demand Access – Join for as long as you need support. The previous weekly videos and Q&A sessions are available anytime you need them (and searchable by keyword). Got a burning question at 3 am when your teen just came home after curfew in YOUR car? We’ve got you covered.

Full of Caring Parents Like You – Our community is for brave, courageous parents who are committed to bettering their relationships with their teens. They understand they play a role in changing the relationship dynamic and are willing to try new things.

It’s Not Therapy – We don’t view each other or our family relationships as broken or needing to be fixed and we’re certainly not another toxic venting group for close-minded parents to complain about their teen’s annoying habits. We’re here to courageously lean in and take action to better our family bonds, even when it feels uncomfortable and hard.

Safe Place – There’s no need to pretend things are good when they’re not. We understand parenting is hard and parenting tweens and teens is even harder. We are here to encourage and support each other even when we have different parenting styles and values.

By joining Finding Our Way, you get:

  • WEEKLY VIDEOS about relationship topics from establishing and enforcing boundaries to crisis communication for families.

  • PROVEN TOOLS and simple downloads you can use right away to improve communication and lower stress.

  • FULL ACCESS to our digital library with a SEARCH FUNCTION so you get what you need when you need it without watching every video.

  • LIVE WEEKLY Q&A answering your questions and addressing challenges (sessions remain in the group so you’ll never miss a thing).

  • PLUS A COMMUNITY of committed parents just like you to share in the journey (in all its messy, complicated, and challenging goodness).

Our topics range from setting boundaries to detoxing communication and EVERYTHING in between – what we discuss is driven by you!

Here’s a sampling of our most recent topics:

TRY IT for 2 weeks for $1

Does your teen bait you into no-win conversations?

Does your teenager ever start a random conversation with no context?

And it doesn’t seem to matter what you say, but you’re not going to get it right. Or you ask them a simple question and you get a really edgy answer that you’re pretty sure there’s something behind, but you’re not sure if you want to unravel that ball of yarn just right now?

Teenagers are often sending the signal that they’re trying to push you away.

They’re trying to shut you down or get you to say something wrong, catch you in something where they can be right. Don’t pay attention to the behavior. Listen to the message.

This is actually a teenager’s way of, you know, how two-year-old will pull your hair or throw sand at you because they’re trying to be your friend and they don’t know how to say it? It’s the same for teenagers.

They’re actually trying to connect with you and get you into a more meaningful conversation.

And they have no idea how. And so what comes across this, this really rude boy, sometimes dramatic and edgy behavior.

If you only pay attention to the behavior, you’re going to think they’re trying to push you away. When an actual fact, that’s their attempt to create a meaningful conversation and connect with you.

Over 5,000 teenagers recently told me that their greatest pain is their disconnection with you.

A 2018 study from the Canadian mental health association shows that teenagers who are more connected to their parents tend to participate less in drinking sexual activity and drugs. And they also are more engaged at school and get better grades that edgy behavior is a signal for you to ask questions and get curious about what’s behind it.

I just got of the phone with another devastated parent

I just got off the phone with another devastated parent…

Who found baggies from drugs, drug paraphernalia, their vape charger refills. Their child has been going to parties day in and day out drinking so much. They’re vomiting all over inside the car. And then when they try and have a conversation about it the next day, they don’t even remember it enough to talk about it. And what’s worse. The child has also told them that they’re engaging in high levels of sexual activity.

There’s a perception that this only happens to bad families.

And it’s absolutely not true in spite of these parents, every best intention, loving and caring to raise their baby, giving it everything they’ve got. This still happens. This isn’t the first call I’ve got like this, and I’m certain it won’t be the last.

There are few things more heartbreaking as a parent than learning your child is making wildly different decisions than you had in mind for them. If this experience sounds familiar to you and you know, now at least most of what your teen is up to, it’s not too late. In fact, this is the time to dig into reconnecting with your teenager so that you can help them make different decisions and change that relationship.

Maybe you’re just starting to see some signs of change?

Things that make you go, Hmm, a little attitude shift some language. They don’t want to be around you as much. And they just aren’t sharing the same kind of information. This is a time to start asking questions and learning tools to open the conversation up again.

Maybe you want to be proactive about the teen years?

You know, it’s not all going to be flowers and roses. So you may as well learn the skills now to stay connected to your teenager through their difficult time of change and come out with a healthy relationship on the other end, no matter what stage you’re at with your teenager, be intentional about connecting and talk to them often because these challenges aren’t going away and giving up isn’t an option

Before the worst-case parenting scenario happens to your family…

Kids make mistakes.

They always have, they always will. From toddlers who decide to “decorate” the walls with permanent marker to the surprise haircuts the give their siblings, kids do wrong things all the time.

Teenagers are no different.

Except for the choices they are facing are much bigger with even bigger consequences to match. Now they are deciding whether to try vaping, drinking, or drugs, become sexually active or test out ditching school.

That puts a LOT of pressure on teens and their parents to not mess up.

Maybe you’ve already seen a few little warning signs that something is different with your teen (was that vape you smelled on their favorite hoodie?). Maybe you’ve been hit with a parenting wham-o when you find a hidden report card full of big red Fs.

Denial doesn’t help them. This matters right NOW.

Telling yourself “Things are fine” or “Kids will be kids…what can you do?” won’t help them.

YOU WILL.

You are entering the toughest parenting stage and your best defence against all the other stuff out there is your relationship with your teen. It doesn’t mean they won’t still mess up (they will), it doesn’t mean they won’t fight against your rules (it’s normal).

What it does mean is when the time comes for whatever happens, you have the tools and skills to handle it WITH your teen (not AT your teen). That kind of relationship doesn’t happen overnight and it certainly doesn’t happen in the middle of teenaged behaviour chaos.

Get started now.

Your teen wants what everyone wants: to feel understood without judgement. It’s challenging sometimes because after years of believing everything you told them, they now have their own opinions and beliefs that may conflict with yours.

Even if you don’t get why they do what they do, you can still be there for them and support them in making better decisions. Let me show you how.

What parents are saying

I am beyond grateful for you and all you are sharing. I will be a loyal follower for life❤️ My relationships with my kids, family, and friends will be better because of you.

Stephanie Merli

I really look forward to Aly’s videos – she always presents something I can use to have more open and honest conversations with my teenagers

Marnie Ashcroft, Glow Juicery

I love your videos. My son and I watch your videos together and actually work through them slowly to process it.

Marion

Aly is such a wonderful resource for parents raising a family. She encourages you to move forward and make changes with just a few adjustments. Aly teaches you how to talk to your children in a way that validates their feelings while being their parent, not their friend. She helps you feel confident about new ways of connecting with your children and doesn’t criticize when things feel hard.

Deanna Sprague
  • WEEKLY VIDEOS about relationship topics from establishing and enforcing boundaries to crisis communication for families.

  • PROVEN TOOLS and downloads you can use right away to improve communication and lower stress.

  • FULL ACCESS to our digital library with a SEARCH FUNCTION! Get what you need when you need it without watching every video.

  • LIVE WEEKLY Q&A answering your questions and addressing challenges (sessions remain in the group so you’ll never miss a thing).

  • PLUS A COMMUNITY of committed parents just like you to share in the journey (in all its messy, complicated, and challenging goodness).

TRY IT for 2 weeks for $1
By joining Finding OUR Way, you will get…

1: PARENTING SUPPORT  

  • By a certified relationship professional who can help you avoid the common relationship pitfalls
  • From a committed community of caring parents who care as much as you do and are probably going through the SAME THINGS AS YOU ARE
  • Inside our easy-to-access digital library filled with videos and downloadable worksheets for you to begin your journey

2: BETTER CONVERSATIONS WITH YOUR TEEN

  • Because now your dialogue based on mutual trust and respect
  • The ability to recognize toxic communication habits (and what to do about them)
  • An unshakable communication foundation free of the distracting nonsense that gets you nowhere

3: LESS RELATIONSHIP FRICTION

  • When boundaries and expectations are clearly communicated and understood
  • Knowing how to deal with conflict without it turning toxic
  • Simple communication tools to cut through the noise

4: CONFIDENCE

  • To talk about the tough stuff openly and honestly.
  • Knowing you are prepared for whatever teenaged challenges face you now or in the future.
  • To be the parent your friends and family turn to for advice (because you’ve talked through these problems within the group and know what to say).

5: RELATIONSHIP FOUNDATION

  • The start of a lifelong relationship with your teen.
  • Pride in knowing you are modeling healthy relationship behavior to help them succeed in future relationships.
  • The freedom to disagree because you know conflict is no longer an enemy of the relationship.

About Me

Growing up, I was the smart, fun girl on the outside, and a frantic and anxious mess on the inside. I spent years healing the pain of dysfunctional family relationships and releasing negative patterns to break the cycle with my own family.

I was the classic black sheep of the family, everything about me opposite to them. I was loud and chaotic, they were reserved and organized. I loved hugs, attention, and sharing openly, they valued personal space, being backstage, and keeping their thoughts and feelings to themselves. To them, I was misbehaved or embarrassing. This massive gap of acceptance belonging precipitated in my suicide attempt at 15.

Today, I’ve been happily married to my husband for over 23 years, and we have 2 incredible teen boys. My passion is helping parents connect with their teens through respectful conversations, the first step in building healthy, lasting relationships.

Access coaching techniques my clients pay thousands for…

Why Learn From Me?

I get people. Period.

I’ve known from a young age this is what I’m here to do. I intuitively understood what works and what doesn’t in relationships, and how changing the words (and sometimes the tone) makes a message receivable by its intended listener.

After years of being the go-to for no-bullshit advice within my circle of friends and family, I went back to school to formally study relationship coaching, earning my relationship coaching certification.

I started the Finding Our Way program in response to the increased calls and messages I was getting from stressed out, caring parents were at a loss of how to help their teenager navigate the challenges of relationships, school, anxiety, drugs, sex, and more.

These courageous parents had tried everything yet knew they needed more in-depth and specific tools to reach their teen before the arguments escalated to bad decision making. I realized these brave parents weren’t the only ones. I needed to create a space for all the parents out there looking for help.

Certified Relationship Coach

Unlike life coaching which focuses on the individual, relationship coaching addresses the complexity of the interaction between 2 or more people, sometimes in a working environment, sometimes in a family environment.

The focus isn’t on a specific member of the relationship, but on the relationship itself, using the principles of Emotional Intelligence (the relationship with oneself), and Social Intelligence (the relationship with others) to create Relationship Systems Intelligence.

Parent to Two Teenagers and Aunt to Many

I’m a mom to two almost grown boys that I parented solo for many years while my husband was away. Like many parents, I thought I was going to crumble under the weight of handling our boys’ unique challenges, along with working, stretching our pennies, and taking care of the house.

Using the tools I learned in a decade of personal development and my coaching training, I was able to help my anxious son cope with daily stresses and overstimulation, and manage my emotion-filled, strong-willed son’s boundary-pushing.  As my nieces and the ‘adopted daughters’ grew up, I became their first call (or text) for support with their relationship challenges.

The teens and tweens who call on me for support know three key things: 1) I will always love them and be available 2) I won’t judge them for their choices, and 3) I won’t let them off the hook when it comes to taking responsibility.

Mentor to Thousands of Teens

Almost by accident and literally overnight, I become the DAILY mentor for thousands of teens on TikTok, hearing their frustrations with their parents, and answering their messages about relationship challenges and worries.

It shouldn’t be a surprise that teens seek me out online because the teens in my life regularly tell me the stuff they won’t (or feel they can’t) tell their parents. I offer them empathy, help them understand what’s going on, and challenge them to be part of the solution.

Experienced Executive Coach

I started my career working with families and was quickly pulled into the corporate world to help executive teams remove toxicity from their culture. Every tool I use to untangle corporate relationships applies to create positive family relationships.

It wasn’t the business that wasn’t working, it was the relationships IN the business. They had a toxic environment that was hurting their bottom line. Those business leaders needed to do the same thing parents need to do: build trust.

Trusted Guest Expert

Thanks to my ability to connect with teens and tweens, I have become a trusted guest expert for numerous publications and podcasts, including the on-air parenting expert for SunFM 105.7 Vernon and regular contributor for Calgary’s Child.

Today, I share my no-nonsense advice to thousands of teens and tweens via my TikTok and Instagram accounts as well as the parenting relationship expert for What She Said podcast.

  • WEEKLY VIDEOS about relationship topics from establishing and enforcing boundaries to crisis communication for families.

  • PROVEN TOOLS and downloads you can use right away to improve communication and lower stress.

  • FULL ACCESS to our digital library with a SEARCH FUNCTION! Get what you need when you need it without watching every video.

  • LIVE WEEKLY Q&A answering your questions and addressing challenges (sessions remain in the group so you’ll never miss a thing).

  • PLUS A COMMUNITY of committed parents just like you to share in the journey (in all its messy, complicated, and challenging goodness).

TRY IT for 2 weeks for $1
Parenting shouldn’t be a solo journey…

Every parent needs support in helping their teen on the journey to adulthood. That is not to say married parents automatically have it in their spouse or single parents don’t have it by virtue of their living arrangements.

It means every parent needs someone (or a community of someones) to turn to when the going gets tough. They need a group of likeminded parents to bounce ideas off of and a safe place to share concerns when a new situation arises.

No one said it was easy, and they also said you don’t need to do it alone. Join us!

Is Finding OUR Way for Parents right for you?

Yes!

  • If you ARE experiencing challenges with your teen that you don’t quite know how to handle without it turning into an all-out war of wills.

  • If you AREN’T currently experiencing challenges, but you want to be prepared and confident for if and when they happen.

  • If you’re a committed and open-minded parent who wants to be the best parent (and partner) you can be.

  • If you’re ready and willing to try new skills.

  • If you’re respectful of different parenting approaches within the group.

  • If you’re ready to see your teen as they are (and call them on their bullshit if that is what is needed) because truth is always the best place to start.

  • WEEKLY VIDEOS about relationship topics from establishing and enforcing boundaries to crisis communication for families.

  • PROVEN TOOLS and downloads you can use right away to improve communication and lower stress.

  • FULL ACCESS to our digital library with a SEARCH FUNCTION! Get what you need when you need it without watching every video.

  • LIVE WEEKLY Q&A answering your questions and addressing challenges (sessions remain in the group so you’ll never miss a thing).

  • PLUS A COMMUNITY of committed parents just like you to share in the journey (in all its messy, complicated, and challenging goodness).

TRY IT for 2 weeks for $1
Frequently Asked Questions

Q: Can I hire Aly to work specifically with me and my teenager?

A: No. Aly is currently focusing her energy on Finding Our Way and making it the best resource for you for thousands less than working with her on an individual basis.