This less than scholarly, goofy cow helped us illustrate many conversations that the chore chart was not a limitation on our boys’ capacity or responsibilities; it was the starting point. Anything else was about helping others with a kind and open heart.
My husband and I learned to put a softer focus on the chore chart, letting go of black and white consequences when tasks were missed. We celebrated like crazy when our boys went of their way to help us and each other.
“How can I help?”
This has become one of the most important phrases in our home. These four, powerful words remind us what Ben the cow was try hard to have Otis understand.
- stretch our capacity beyond ourselves
- humble ourselves as equals
- be vulnerable in offering and receiving help
- we’re stronger together
Helping your child build ‘other’ awareness is a journey with every ‘it’s not my turn’ becoming a conversation toward ‘how can I help?’. We’re still on the journey with teenagers we just use less of Otis.
As parents, we often set out with great intentions only to find those same intentions have unintended consequences.
Don’t throw the baby out with the bathwater!
Every great tool can be reworked to get back on track, it just takes some thinking and the occasional cartoon cow. Are you feeling stuck? Click here to send me your question or concern and I’ll create a blog with my top tips for you.