When I went away to university I knew right away the messages going on in my head weren’t normal and got myself into counselling in a hot minute. I spent the next 10 years fiercely pursuing healing to free myself my my emotional pain and the negative coping patterns I’d developed.
When I became a parent, I was resolved to creating a different experience for my children. Our children would feel loved and celebrated, they’d be polite and compliant, and I’d never need to raise my voice or a hand ……BAHAHA!! Then I realized, “Holy crap! This is hard!”
I found myself solo parenting our two boys while my husband was away for extended periods, there was more month than money, and starting to recognize the same negative patterns from my past. You know, when you open your mouth and your parent’s voice comes out?!
I found myself on my knees in tears, feeling crushed by the weight of parenting alone, so far from the fantasy I had in mind with no clue how to get out. I felt like I was drowning and could barely breathe. Every day, I felt I was climbing a slippery, muddy wall and getting nowhere, yet desperately longing for a new reality.
How could this be happening? I had done all this healing and learning! I began to wonder…”Is there something wrong with me? Maybe I wasn’t different after all?”
During my life and relationship systems coaching training, I realized how dysfunctional relationship patterns are created, AND how to untangle and heal from them. I knew I needed to share these powerful tools to support parents to better understand teens like me. I felt driven to share my knowledge, experience, and education so families could effectively communicate and connect in healthy, lasting relationships with far less stress, emotional pain, or trauma.